Joining the Century Club... finally...

So I finally made it into the solid triple digits this weekend after what has been a torrid year and a half of crazy swinging and adventures. It was capped off at this weekend's sex party's with exploits that included a smoking hot NYC based Russian wife - whose fellatio technique was off the charts, some other attractive suburban hotwives getting their chocolate fix and some swinging regulars I know well.

Now, I know, it is a little juvenile (and some might say unnecessarily macho and sexist) to celebrate the idea of any number of sexual partners as an achievement but I remember how much work it used to take to get *one* partner into the sack during some of my worse plain vanilla days (with no guarantee that the sex was going to be anything better than mediocre)... and let's be real, the former nerd with the wedge on his shoulder in me has never forgotten the days when it felt like I would NEVER get the sex I want, in the quantities and with the requisite amount of abandon and enthusiasm I personally require for my own warped definition of happiness.

So What Now ?

I don't know. I don't think in the long run, that averaging tens of partners a month is sustainable but it does feel great to be able to f*ck like a rockstar every now and then, with no strings, no expectations other than those for good sex and no social kabuki to rub me the wrong way. I remember talking to an older swinger a few years ago about how I would stop counting once I joined the century club and I remember him chuckling... he said he was going to stop counting once he broke a 1000 - at that point in time he was in the 800s....

To be fair, how does plain vanilla monogamy look attractive once you have achieved a sh*tload of your personal sexual fantasies - MFF and MFM threesomes, Gangbangs, Lesbian viewing parties, multiple women in 24 hours, etc ? When you can, with a lot less work, get the sexual variety you need with much less effort than at any other time in your life ?

For me, and I can only speak for myself - the lasso of regular sex; which is why a lot of guys get into relationships - just isn't good enough. I need more, I need a hot woman, with an insatiable sex drive - and I'm still not sure that justifies a relationship.

My problem, my flaw if you will is that sex is my drug and I am never satisfied.... so I guess for now, I'll continue being the high functioning addict I am.

Tomorrow is always a new day.

New Summer, New Friends...

Sorry for the absence dear readers. I was very busy throughout May, with travel, work and other obligations. It was a month for some R & R too. I indulged myself in Sin City and in a few other places on the west coast.

I made some new friends, K & B. Both very engaging ladies in the bay area who are into BBC for fun... and some hot nights were had by all.

However, this summer will not be as crazy as my last one. I have made some new friends including a particularly engaging hotwife from the NJ area who really knows how to treat me right. It is safe to say that while I will not be indulging myself in the craziness, I will be keeping busy with playmates, old and new this summer.

Watch this space.

Smoothing my sexual consumption curve... or how I learned to love the Weekend Sex Party...

For most of my NYC life, I have been focused on Career/Education, Sex with no strings attached, Staying fit/enjoying the social and cultural benefits of the city [in that order].... It has been a great ride but there has always been one riddle I tried to solve; one problem I struggled to crack - even as I went from an NYC newbie to someone who calls this crazy town home....

As a younger NYC bachelor, my biggest headache - especially as what some might term a commitmentphobe - was dealing with flings, getting sex on a regular basis and dealing with that point in plain vanilla dating when the woman you've been seeing finally realizes that yes - you are one of those guys who is looking for something "fun" and non-serious and that no; the sex or the promise of regular sex wouldn't change your mind.

What this would inevitably result in was; in terms of my sexual consumption; a series of flings over the course of the year - usually lasting 2 - 4 months on average, from the first date, through regular sex and then through the "breakup" if you will.

Sometimes the women - all great girls all of them, realized that I wouldn't want anything more and initiated the disengagement, other times, I had to pull the trigger myself. Away from the flings, the year would be punctuated by 2 - 3 swinging adventures (with couples and singles) and one or two one night stands.

Some years - this combo was enough for a decent amount of sex, in others it was woefully lacking. In addition, given my complete and utter aversion to the pathetic big city male habit of acquiring a girlfriend mainly for the sex - this meant that in some years I dealt with some truly epic droughts (one in my first year in the city was as long as 6, may be 8 months). That was a tough year on a variety of fronts.

I know - especially in my occupation, that a lack of stress relief leaves the 646hedonist stressed and angry on almost regular basis. Combining this with my frustration at the fact that Straight Men are the only ones for whom such droughts are acceptable... Women/Gay and Bi people don't work for sex in the same ways that Straight men are and of course you can see why I have decided to never let my life be decided by plain vanilla considerations.

However, in the past year and a half I have taken advantage of; away from dating and swinging one on ones, one of the greatest swinger traditions of all: the weekend party.

Swingers love to party - in groups, one on ones, same room swap, soft play etc. What the party does is that it takes the onus away from the individual partier and puts it in the hand of a gracious host; who provides a venue, makes introductions and basically allows for the X rated equivalent of a mixer... where sex is on hand and everyone can leave satisfied. There are all kinds of parties - gangbang parties, fetish parties, IR parties.... all girl parties...

Usually held on a weekend night, and advertised on a variety of swinger sites and groups... they are the perfect antidote to a tough week - and a way for people like myself to connect with old friends, meet new people and engage in some good old, consensual, Sport fucking.

I have fucked 10 women at a party in a single night, had threesomes at parties and have enjoyed myself at dedicated party houses, have watched women get double penetrated by men they met 5 minutes earlier while their husbands watched, taken XXX rated photos, cavorted in hotel suites and have played in on premise clubs.

But even more compelling than the craziness I just described in the paragraph above is the promise of variety - which is what keeps party goers coming back... more than any bar, the well run, well regarded sex party is smorgasbord of safe, consensual, no holds barred fun... a way for like minded people to explore in a discreet, safe and orgasmic place.. allowing them to leave their lives behind and then to emerge from the weekend, refreshed, glowing and ready to tackle the week and their lives.

And of course, when plain vanilla friends and coworkers ask:

"How was your weekend ?"

The smiling reply comes back: "it was good, I went to a party and caught up with some friends, it was a lot of fun".

Outstanding Dick Riding...

Take some notes ladies... this is what being fit does for you:

Outstanding work.

God Bless You, you cocksucker....

That's right. God bless the cocksucker, the cock worshiper, the blow-job artiste if you will. The woman who will, via a combination of her mouth, tongue throat and hands, service you to a fulfilling orgasm. They are unsung and unheralded heroes that need more encouragement.

The thought crossed my mind as I was enjoying an exquisite blow job from a blonde hot-wife over the weekend.... a woman whose attention to detail, desire to please and her enjoyment whenever I let go in her mouth put her right up there with some of the best cocksuckers i have ever known (and I've known a few in my time)....

The first time I thought about writing a post/homage if you will to women who give exquisite blow-jobs occurred when I met an IR couple on one of my travels and I asked them how they had gotten together.

Him: Well I put an ad on Craig's list looking for a BBC cock worshiper
She: That's what I love to do. Obviously I had to make sure he was sane and cool.
Him: It didn't take that long for you to do that, we met in a coffee shop and 30 minutes later, we were at my place and you were on your knees.

A few minutes later I got to play with her myself and her beau was right; she was a tremendous cock-sucker. It was her god-given talent.

I truly believe that some women underestimate the power of a good blow-job. , which is why there is still this vocal minority of women who do not do/give oral sex...

God bless them, but the amazing cocksucker knows the power she holds, a power that can be honed with enthusiasm.

I mean, let's face it - some women intrinsically have better rhythm, others feel tighter than others, other women know exactly how to move.... some of this can be taught, some of it can't.... but any woman can learn how to give a great blow-job.

So here's to those women who know how to give the toe-curling, tongue-lashing, body shaking, orgasm inducing blow-jobs I enjoy so much. Reciprocation is definitely your due and yes, you have a right to be popular; you do something I enjoy.... very very much.

Now if only I could find a reliable cock-worshiper of my very own....

Thinking about Peter Pan Syndrome...

So I was out last week with some old colleagues and I ran into one... an attractive asian girl now in her late 20s... who was mulling over some life changes.

She was thinking about leaving NYC, where she'd grown up her whole life for the relative safety of the midwest.

And why was she making this change... well the subtext was that after years of being in the "scene" (she went to one of the fancy private schools in the city) and having her fun, she was now finding it hard in her late 20s to find a nice professional young man in NYC to settle down with.

And of course she blamed this on the "Peter Pan Syndrome" prevalent here in NYC.

I find this idea fascinating as I hear it more and more as we age... and girls my age are trying to get themselves married off/locked down etc.

I have two criticisms of Peter Pan syndrome - one is structural and the other is behavioral, and b) I believe that women enable it... and should expect it.

First of all, in a town like New York, it takes a long time to build a career. In my business, career success is measured in 7 figures and it takes a lot of dedication, workaholism and focus to get to that level. As such, a lot of the driven, focused young men who might make good romantic partners are very focused on getting ahead.... as they should.. because NYC women (the ones worth dating anyway) make it very clear that they do not date losers. So for most of their 20s, you'll find the career focused New Yorker dating around, but saving his energies and his focus for his career.

And finally, when that career success comes; the first thing on his mind is not a desire to rush out and get married. He's not the one with the biological clock... he wants to enjoy the fruits of his labor... and now, he's finally in a position where he can work a little less and women can work a bit more.

Let's face it - Women do not work for sex and they have an advantage on men from ages 15 till 30; maybe 35 for a sub set... but then the advantage switches to men who have gotten their act together. So why; especially if you are a man trying to enjoy the companionship of a variety of women, are you going to stop when you finally have a good thing going.

Unfortunately it's a hard reality for women to hear, but Peter Pan Syndrome in NYC is caused by a combination of structural issues (you need to make a lot more money to be successful here) and game theory (men now have an upper hand in dating and mating, why would they let that go).

So while it's tragic that my former colleague is leaving our fair town, it might just be what she needs.... the cost of living and the opportunity cost of marriage... both financially and sexually is lower in the midwest.

The New Party Blues...

So last night I finally got to make it to an IR party out in NJ that I had heard about from a few friends in the IR scene. The party itself did not disappoint, at least 10 couples, a smattering of single ladies and some very action oriented play....

However my performance was tepid to say the least.

For some reason I was more than a little tentative; acting like a newbie despite my experience .... It didn't help that I did not get to play with some of the hotter chicks at the party but that's also just a case of being in the right place at the right time...

I have told you all about my binge-fucking craziness but last night I was positively restrained - I only fucked 2 new women, a few blowjobs, and there were periods of time when my little man was just not cooperating - at all.

Chatting with a few other guys in the swing scene; the consensus was that it was a combination of a new environment, some self selection on my part (and I did not say this but you all know how I feel about group activity with people I do not know).

I have swung long enough to know that you can't force it and that you cannot expect to be on point every night - being able to fuck 10 different women and a few multiple times... but goddamit, that's what I've done in the past....

Yesterday was a subpar night, but i'll take it over no sex at all... here's hoping for better swinging nights some time in future soon though!